Deputized on Ash Wednesday

It’s Ash Wednesday. I feel a little sad about that. Why? When I think of Ash Wednesday, here’s the thing I remember most.

I was a chaplain at Baylor Scott & White Heart and Vascular Hospital in Dallas. Even though I wasn’t Catholic, each Ash Wednesday I was deputized to impose Ashes on the foreheads of anyone who wanted them. I received Ashes and then was deputized to impose them on others. I would visit every unit at the hospital to make sure people could get Ashes if they wanted them. There were always lots of questions:

• Why does your head have a black mark on it?
  To be deputized to impose Ashes, you have to receive Ashes and be repentant.

• What is the significance of imposing Ashes?
  I’m not Catholic, but it has to do with realizing we are sinful and we need God. At least, that’s my interpretation.

• Do you have to be Catholic?
  No. See my forehead. I had it done and I’m not Catholic.

• Do I have to become Catholic?
  No. See the above answer. In fact, you stay just the way you are.

• Do you have to be religious?
  I’m not speaking for the Catholic (or any other church), but I could imagine everyone feels like a mess sometime in their lives. Right then is a perfect moment for your own Ash Wednesday. Even if you don’t have Ashes. If you want to call on the Universe and say, I need help, then do that then. Don’t be bound by any ideology or belief system where it doesn’t fit you.

People from all different traditions wanted me to give them Ashes. Go ahead, hit me!

Before coming to work at the hospital, Ash Wednesday wasn’t part of my faith tradition. But, in a surprising turn, it became every year’s most Sacred event. I got to touch the heads of countless patients, family members, and staff, offer the words, “Repent and believe the Gospel,” and then impose Ashes. This little encounter symbolized all that gives me hope about the human and divine.

I miss those days. This is the second year where I haven’t touched those foreheads. For all of you I did touch, who were on my list each year, I still send you my love. The Ashes went one way. The Touch, though, went both.

For all my friends, patients, and family members. For my wife and dogs who put up with long, long days.

I had help with this post from my preferred AI, Claude.ai by Anthropic.