Worldwide Stew

The Obligations of Witnessing

Many years ago, I worked in a little religious school. One of the children could barely speak. She had many siblings. She came to school with bruises. One day she accidentally fell out of the car. I told the principal that we should report the situation. I was told that it wasn’t our business and that reporting them to government authorities wasn’t right. I still anonymously reported them. My employment ended soon thereafter. I guess suspicion that I had called Child Protective Services was enough.

Satisfaction Guaranteed or Your Money Back

Satisfaction guaranteed or your money back.

When someone says, Satisfaction guaranteed or your money back they are upping the value of their promise. They are saying, You have nothing to lose.

But, even if you are able to get your money back, you’ve still lost something: time and trust. Broken trust steadily erodes our lives and connections. The return of our money can’t return the time and hope for a resolution to our problem.

When Algorithms Go Wrong

My phone’s keyboard consistently turns “and” into “abs” when I swipe-type, an algorithm error that happens dozens of times weekly. Despite how frequently I use “and” versus how rarely anyone types “abs,” the code refuses to learn my patterns.

We operate on similar faulty algorithms. When our partner raises a concern, our mental predictive text instantly jumps to defensiveness, hearing criticism when they’re offering connection. Like my stubborn keyboard, we’ve been programmed by past experiences to misinterpret what’s actually being said.

What matters to me?

Asking Why am I here? is probably wasting time. It’s like a termite trying to eat a sequoia. It’s too big and carries little action.

You’re probably better off asking two other questions:

• What things matter to me?
• What things matter to the people I care about?

There’s a host of other questions you can (and should) ask. But these are awesome places to start or reset. Begin with either one, then tackle the other one.

Being conscientious isn't a moral virtue.

Working hard - being conscientious - is not a moral virtue. It’s not enough.

The grade on your assignment has nothing to do with how hard you worked on it. You get a grade dependent on your answers being correct. If we didn’t answer the questions, show our work, or do the work, the teacher won’t care. The point wasn’t to work hard. The point of the assignment is to get the correct answer and show your work.