Worldwide Stew

Go to Your Room

I suspect my Mom wasn’t the only parent who responded to her children’s loud disagreements and fighting by telling us to go to our rooms.

It was good advice. When we get caught up in fight (part of the fight, flight, faint network), the chemicals coursing through our bodies want to defend ourselves from fear of shame, embarrassment, and , occasionally, physical injury.

Often, the most mindful way of navigating our fear, anger, and doubt is to separate ourselves from the circumstances. This is especially true if we can learn to be aware of arousal. Awareness can be our Earkly Warning System! It gives us space to rewrite the story we’re telling ourselves. Usually, that’s the problem: the story that’s taken residence in our mind. They’re taking advantage of us. They don’t value my feelings. They always treat me this way.

Distractions, attention, and focus

It was a beautiful winter night to take our dog out for a walk. Looking toward the west I saw the planetary alignment my wife had told me about earlier that day. I immediately pulled out my phone to capture a picture. But, the picture didn’t look just right. So, I opened a browser window to see what settings to adjust for night shots. I must have messed with my phone settings for ten minutes before the ridiculousness of the situation dawned on me.

What matters to me?

Asking Why am I here? is probably wasting time. It’s like a termite trying to eat a sequoia. It’s too big and carries little action.

You’re probably better off asking two other questions:

• What things matter to me?
• What things matter to the people I care about?

There’s a host of other questions you can (and should) ask. But these are awesome places to start or reset. Begin with either one, then tackle the other one.

Being conscientious isn't a moral virtue.

Working hard - being conscientious - is not a moral virtue. It’s not enough.

The grade on your assignment has nothing to do with how hard you worked on it. You get a grade dependent on your answers being correct. If we didn’t answer the questions, show our work, or do the work, the teacher won’t care. The point wasn’t to work hard. The point of the assignment is to get the correct answer and show your work.

Deputized on Ash Wednesday

It’s Ash Wednesday. I feel a little sad about that. Why? When I think of Ash Wednesday, here’s the thing I remember most.

I was a chaplain at Baylor Scott & White Heart and Vascular Hospital in Dallas. Even though I wasn’t Catholic, each Ash Wednesday I was deputized to impose Ashes on the foreheads of anyone who wanted them. I received Ashes and then was deputized to impose them on others. I would visit every unit at the hospital to make sure people could get Ashes if they wanted them. There were always lots of questions: